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KAVIDA REI - I.T.E.C. dip. I.R.C.I am a writer specialising in the subjects of tantra, music and sexuality and a qualified tantric guide and sex therapist, working in Hertfordshire and London.
I also compose music for tantric meditation and lovemaking.
Below is a brief version of my life story, which may be of interest to you, or maybe not. If you wish to see a simple CV, please skip to the bottom of the page.
I grew up in a provincial, seaside town in the south of England in which I struggled to fit in. From an early age I searched for more meaning in life, often in ways that hurt both myself and my family. I found some personal solace by throwing myself into acting, playing the violin, singing in choirs – activities which took me out of myself, transporting me to a different realm, an altered state of consciousness, if you like.
I poured myself into performing, composing music and writing poetry and prose - anything that opened the fountain of creativity that, whilst flowing, miraculously managed to wash away all stress and negativity that seemed to plague me as a teenager. Looking back I see that those hobbies were meditations of sorts – the discipline of perfecting my violin playing for five hours a day, alone, brought me a centredness and self-awareness that has since been matched only by practising tantric meditation.
After a few years of almost reaching my potential at college I dropped out, busking for a year, before heading to the States for some fresh input, where I immersed myself in the ground-breaking trainings developed by the New York Actors Institute and personal development courses run by Landmark Education.Falling for a local, with Manhattan serving as the backdrop for a rather accelerated romance, we tied the knot and set off to the west coast of America to pursue our respective careers as film-maker and singer/songwriter.
Getting pregnant soon put paid to the idea of my becoming the next Joni Mitchell, and I let all fantasies of stardom dissolve in the all-consuming ocean of motherhood. On some inexplicable whim, I insisted we move back home and my hubby, an Anglophile since he’d visited the country as a teenager, was happy to emigrate.
A year later I found myself obsessing over a lively two year old. I began to suspect that extricating myself from the house for a few hours a week in order to interact with adult humans who could form sentences with a beginning, middle and an end would inevitably save my son from being smothered and winding up in expensive therapy. I enrolled on a massage training, which led to a new and unexpected career and something to talk about other than vaccinations and potty training.
After my second son was born I decided to improve my counselling skills in order to support my growing massage practice. I spent two years gaining a counselling diploma through the Amap Organisation, a now defunct college that was run by the inspired, visionary psychotherapist, Anne Geraghty.
During these mad, toddler-taming years, my marriage came to an amicable end and we decided to live five minutes apart and share the raising of the children equally between us. Being a half-time mother gave me the luxury to devote some time to expanding my repertoire of healing skills. As well as learning Reiki I also deepened my practice of yoga with a private teacher.
It was hard sometimes to make it work and the most important lesson I learnt from those years was that I had to let go of anger, resentment and also control of the lives of others. It required an open-hearted generosity on both sides.
In 1998, having heard about tantra I enrolled on a workshop with Diamond Light Tantra. It was a truly enlightening weekend, which made me aware of the vastness of the subject and the potential for bringing tantra into my therapy practice. Soon after this I came across Sarita and her well-respected School of Awakening. This extraordinary ‘school’, true to its name, turned me inside out and finally brought me face to face with my true nature. I continue to assist Sarita on her inspiring workshops.
As well as running a private therapy practice, I now write about my three favourite subjects – music, tantra and sex.
Currently, I’m working on a novel. It’s a thrilling tale of music and adultery and if you’re interested in publishing it, please contact my agent immediately - www.thedorispartnership.co.uk
I’m also fortunate to still find time to make music, and continue to compose, play and perform as often as I am able.
CV1979 Dartington College of Arts – classical music and English
1981 Guildford School of Acting
1985 New York – Actors Institute, Landmark Education
1986 Los Angeles – Songwriting/Motherhood
1993 London School of Holistic Massage-I.T.E.C. massage diploma
1995 Amap Organisation – diploma in individual and relationship counselling
1998 School of Awakening – tantra
2002 Four year, tantra couples training
2008 Wrote ‘Tantric Sex’ for Dorling Kindersley